Thursday, July 19, 2012

47 -Stealing Home


Mid November 2011


I feel as if I will never be released from the hospital.  From my perspective, I have been here for a number of months, but the calendar does not lie.  It is only mid-November, and I fell into my coma October 16th, and opened my eyes on the twentieth of October.  With all of my trips in and out of reality, I wouldn't be able to approximate the date, day, or time, if the nurses, and medical students didn't tell me.

As of now, the physicians are explaining that there are no more tests they can run.  The M.D. already extracted excess fluid from my abdomen during the most recent paracentesis procedure.  Today, I sense that I am retaining significantly more fluid. The treatment for distention of the abdomen, is caused by ascites, also known as abdominal fluid. 

A paracentesis is similar to releasing pressure in a garden hose.  A needle that is about five inches long, and about the size of a catheter, is inserted into my abdominal cavity.  A doctor is manipulating the needle while a nurse works the ultrasound wand to determine whether they are exporting liquid from my body, or removing body parts.  



When I suggest to the hospital staff that I could use another paracentesis, they inform me that my body cannot handle that kind of stress just yet.  This is on the grounds they exonerated three and a half liters of fluid that were trespassing in my gut only a few days ago.  My liver has already been diagnosed with cirrhosis, and my kidneys are borderline functional.  They have done all they can do.

Therefore, during my long, and drawn out stay, the doctors, nurses, professors, technicians, and medical students have simply kept me stable.  I am conscious, even if out of touch with reality.  Beyond that, I believe I am physically worse for wear.  


I have hardly eaten, and I am experiencing a nearly total loss of motor skills.  I cannot feed myself.  I am unable to roll over in bed.  More than two hours of sleeping, during a simple nap, is not part of my routine.  My paramount of success is my inability to walk, or failure to use the restroom properly, rather than soil my bed.


My mother, and stepfather have been traveling to Charleston, South Carolina, continuously.  They are here as often as they are able.  I know Mom & E wish  they could be with me at all times, however they live approximately seventy miles south of here, in Beaufort, South Carolina.  They will be here this evening, and my roommate/lifesaver is going to be here, as well.

Come to think of it, I have so many friends and family that plan to visit me today, that I feel as if I have missed something.  It is almost like they have failed to remember that I survived this ordeal.  The gathering could pass as a living wake.


Photo:  Faux Capacitor

By:  Donnie Wayne Todd

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